Another Day

Just another hot, boring day. I haven't felt too great today...mostly tired and worn down to the core. Thank goodness for my step-daughter who has been so helpful today with her little sisters. I have been taking steroids for the fatigue and nausea...but man they make me feisty! Ask my husband. I feel like I have no control over my body and its functions. I want to eat crappy, then I feel crappy, and I have no energy to exercise. My body doesn't do what my mind wants it to. On thing I desire to get out of this "cancer experience" is to truly, truly learn control over my body and its passions and desires. Things that should be simple like taking better and more consistent care of my body and emotions. Eating better, exercising, taking time for me...all those things that have slowly been put by the way side.

I was able to take my parents to the Oncologist's office today and meet the staff and the doctor. My Dad seemed a little apprehensive about seeing where his daughter is being treated for cancer. But he came along. I think it was helpful for my Mom to see what was happening to me, since she can't always be here. It was sad to see them go today. They have brought me great comfort...by just being here. I have loved watching them with my children and see their little relationships blossom.

My little two years old is really growing up and changing and watching her has brought me great joy this summer. I am very blessed to have three beautiful girl’s! I hope they know how much I love them. Paige gives me the biggest kisses and says “Love you Mommy”…enough to melt me! I must beat this disease!! I get scared that I won't, but I have got to...if not for me....for them!!