Roses

Today was a special day. A young girl (eleven years old) from our church decided she wanted to do something to help me out since I have cancer. She decided to do a fundraiser on my behalf by doing a little daycare where parents could come and drop off there kids for two hours and she had activities set up for them to do. The parents paid their kids to be watched and she donated that money to us for medical bills. Today they brought over a bouquet of roses in a vase with all the money tied around in it. It was adorable!! She had raised a $130.00!! Can you believe that!!??

It was so touching to see such a young girl looking for ways to help others and I was deeply touched and impressed that she would do that for me and my family. I got emotional...I still can't believe how amazing and supportive people have been! I hope she realized what a good thing she did and I hope she realized she made a difference, not just with money, but by restoring faith that people are good and so are the youth! She made a difference in my life!

I feel very blessed and grateful for good people. I hope one day I can return the favor to those around me. I have learned so much about people and their goodness. Even through this crisis I have witnessed such compassion and love from people I hardly know. I hope to become one of those people.

It has been so nice to have my parents here this week. It is comforting to have my Mom just to talk to and just be myself. We were able to get out for an hour and shop a little today, felt nice to be among the living. We went out to dinner and rented a funny movie...it lifted my spirit. It is also so rewarding to watch my children interact with Grandma and Grandpa. I have worried with them living out of state that they wouldn't get to know their amazing Grandparents. To watch them is so rewarding. Paige learned a new trick on the swing set and Addie learned to go down the slide backwards! They were so proud of themselves...and so was I!

Tonight, I am tired and I feel the poison pulse through my veins...a sensation I can't really describe. It wears me out. Nothing physically brings me pleasure...not food, sleep, nothing. I guess that is where my perspectives have changed. True happiness and peace is not physical it's emotional and spiritual...it really is. It's too bad it had to take cancer for me to see that...but I am grateful I see it now. I believe if I don't "get this" now...I won't get it. I am trying.